Very quick update today.

Two page synopsis is done. New cover letter/query is done.

Contacted my agent, who wants to see the book.

I'll start some posts about how I went about the query and the synopsis this week, but first, to the post office!

My dog is happy.

The Final Read Through

Happy New Year, everyone. I hope you all find this year to be happy, healthy, and successful.

I'm back from my research trip and have volumes of material socked away in my mind for location, people, culture, texture. There's nothing like going someplace fully with the intention of researching for a novel to help you see all the little nuances you'd miss as a tourist.

Traveling has set me back a bit on writing here, which I plan to rectify this year. Look for an update at least once a week as my novel is completed, goes off to the agent, to the publisher and beyond. I'll keep you all posted on all the tricks and tips I learn along the way.

The other set back was on the goal of finishing the book by 12/31. I'm a touch off, but not too bad. Which brings me to the all-important subject of today's post: The Final Read Through.

After going through the whole novel, following the Ten Point Revision Strategy we've discussed, there's still one, immensely important task to do. The Final Read Through.

In order to do this, you must get some distance from the book. Many authors suggest putting the book into the desk drawer to let it cool. For me, the trip to Turkey was perfect. I didn't bring my computer, I didn't work on anything else. I didn't read novels or book or magazines on writing. I let my brain cool. With that, I knew that when I got home, I'd be able to re-approach the novel with fresh eyes.

The goal of this read is to really check for language flow. By this time, after completing the Ten Points, character should be solid. Premise should be like a rock. Major description, flow, pace, all of it should be where you want it. With this read, you're just trying to see how the book. . . reads.

I make little changes to sentences. One thing I really try to do is to limit the amount of times that I back into a sentence. An example:

Sitting on the back porch, Doug reached for his glass of wine.

That phraseology is called, backing into a sentence. the subject is Doug, the action is reaching for the wine, the first clause is purely descriptive.

Now there's nothing wrong with occasionally backing into a sentence. The grammer is ok, and it's nice to use this phraseology to break up the constant; subject-verb sequence. But it can be over done. Check your writing. Occasional is ok, too much is too much.

I also focus on length of sentences, which usually tend to be too long. For the most part, shorter is better. Keep the book moving along with well clipped sentences.

Word selection we've already gone over with the Ten Points, but here again is an opportunity to make sure each word is really working for you. Saying exactly what you want it to do, as powerfully as possible without the need for modifiers to strengthen it.

I'm on chapter 8 of this read. Hopefully I'll be done by next week.

Then it's off.

I'll keep you posted.

Writing the Novel - Another List of Overused Words

I hope everyone's writing is going well and that progress is being made. Again, I'd like to thank all those who've posted comments. Your thoughts are much appreciated and gives me motivation to keep this blog going when I really have so many other things I should be doing. A while back, I posted a list of words that I'd jotted down during various writing courses. These were words to be avoided, poor modifiers, weak descriptors, over-used words. That post has turned out to be one of my favorites, as I go back to it often as I'm rewriting. As I'm nearing completion of my revision, each word it seems is taking on greater importance, and I find myself commonly go back to that list. So for today's post, I wanted to update it and expand it. Some of you may remember that the reason I originally started this blog was to share all that I've learned over the years towards publishing, but also for myself. When I came up with my Ten-Point Revision Strategy, this blog served as a thinking pad for me to flesh those ideas out, help me to concentrate and focus in the important details. And I still find I'm doing that. Each time I post, what I write about is as much to help me understand the topics as it is to offer any insights to the readers. Hopefully, we'll both be able to learn and grow in our writing together. This list has been modified from phschool.com I present it here as a tool for all of us to remember those weak, overused words. If you'd like any further research on the topic, please visit their site. Overused Words about approximately, nearly, almost, approaching, close to

absolutely unconditionally, perfectly, completely, ideally, purely

activity action, movement, operation, labor, exertion, enterprise, project, pursuit, endeavor, job, assignment, pastime, scheme, task

add attach, affix, join, unite, append, increase, amplify

affect adjust, influence, transform, moderate, incline, motivate, prompt

amazing overwhelming, astonishing, startling, unexpected, stunning, dazzling, remarkable

awesome impressive, stupendous, fabulous, astonishing, outstanding

bad defective, inadequate, poor, unsatisfactory, disagreeable, offensive, repulsive, corrupt, wicked, naughty, harmful, injurious, unfavorable

basic essential, necessary, indispensable, vital, fundamental, elementary

beautiful attractive, appealing, alluring, exquisite, gorgeous, handsome, stunning

begin commence, found, initiate, introduce, launch, originate

better preferable, superior, worthier

big enormous, extensive, huge, immense, massive

boring commonplace, monotonous, tedious, tiresome

bring accompany, cause, convey, create, conduct, deliver, produce

cause origin, stimulus, inspiration, motive

certain unquestionable, incontrovertible, unmistakable, indubitable, assured, confident

change alter, transform, vary, replace, diversify

choose select, elect, nominate, prefer, identify

decent respectable, adequate, fair, suitable

definitely unquestionably, clearly, precisely, positively, inescapably

easy effortless, natural, comfortable, undemanding, pleasant, relaxed effective powerful, successful emphasize underscore, feature, accentuate end limit, boundary, finish, conclusion, finale, resolution energy vitality, vigor, force, dynamism enjoy savor, relish, revel, benefit entire complete, inclusive, unbroken, integral excellent superior, remarkable, splendid, unsurpassed, superb, magnificent exciting thrilling, stirring, rousing, dramatic far distant, remote fast swift, quick, fleet, hasty, instant, accelerated fill occupy, suffuse, pervade, saturate, inflate, stock finish complete, conclude, cease, achieve, exhaust, deplete, consume funny comical, ludicrous, amusing, droll, entertaining, bizarre, unusual, uncommon get obtain, receive, acquire, procure, achieve give bestow, donate, supply, deliver, distribute, impart go proceed, progress, advance, move good satisfactory, serviceable, functional, competent, virtuous, striking great tremendous, superior, remarkable, eminent, proficient, expert happy pleased, joyous, elated, jubilant, cheerful, delighted hard arduous, formidable, complex, complicated, rigorous, harsh help assist, aid, support, sustain, serve hurt injure, harm, damage, wound, impair important significant, substantial, weighty, meaningful, critical, vital, notable interesting absorbing, appealing, entertaining, fascinating, thought-provoking job task, work, business, undertaking, occupation, vocation, chore, duty, assignment keep retain, control, possess kind type, variety, sort, form know comprehend, understand, realize, perceive, discern like (adj) similar, equivalent, parallel like (verb) enjoy, relish, appreciate main primary, foremost, dominant make build, construct, produce, assemble, fashion, manufacture mean plan, intend, suggest, propose, indicate more supplementary, additional, replenishment new recent, modern, current, novel next subsequently, thereafter, successively nice pleasant, satisfying, gracious, charming old aged, mature, experienced, used, worn, former, previous open unobstructed, accessible part section, portion, segment, detail, element, component perfect flawless, faultless, ideal, consummate plan scheme, design, system, plot pleasant agreeable, gratifying, refreshing, welcome prove demonstrate, confirm, validate, verify, corroborate quick brisk, prompt, responsive, rapid, nimble, hasty really truly, genuinely, extremely, undeniably regular standard, routine, customary, habitual see regard, behold, witness, gaze, realize, notice small diminutive, miniature, minor, insignificant, slight, trivial sometimes occasionally, intermittently, sporadically, periodically take grasp, capture, choose, select, tolerate, endure terrific extraordinary, magnificent, marvelous think conceive, imagine, ponder, reflect, contemplate try attempt, endeavor, venture, test use employ, operate, utilize very unusually, extremely, deeply, exceedingly, profoundly want desire, crave, yearn, long

Revising the Novel - Word Count

Before we delve deeper into our subject of outlining, I wanted to share what I've learned about a very commonly asked question.

How long should my novel be?

The answer is not "long enough to tell the story." While that may be what we all would love to hear, the truth is publishers and agents have very specific guidelines for novel length depending upon the genre. As I've said before, my work is mainstream fiction, a medical thriller, so that's really all I'm qualified to talk about. If you're writing a romance, or horror, or sci-fi, or literary fiction, you should refer to a good reference book for the answer to that question, like the Writer's Guide. If you're writing a thriller or other mainstream fiction, this is what I've learned. Understand that my goal in writing is publishing and establishing a career, not a whimsical fairy tale of life as an author.

For a first time author, your book length should be 90,000 to 100,000 words, which is about 450 pages. Strict. No more, no less. While you may tell the world's greatest story in 175,000 words, and it may become a huge best-seller, it will be awfully hard, as a first-time writer, to get an agent to look at a book of that length. It may happen. If your writing is so undeniably fantastic, you may be able to hook that agent. And if you are an undeniable talent, your agent may be able to convince a Publishing House to buy your book. But the odds are stacked against you.

Publishing Houses do not like to take chances and invest big dollars into first-time authors. They're very conservative. So what you need to do is follow their guidelines, play their game. They're the ones setting the rules. Once you're as big as Ken Follett you can break the rules and unleash your 1000 page tome. Not now.

So how many pages is 100,000 words?

Obviously, that will depend upon the type and size of font you use. What I recommend, from what I've learned in discussions with agents, is Times New Roman font, 12 point size. Courier is also an accepted font by agents but Times New Roman is the best, and here's why.

The spacing of Courier font adds length to your manuscript. So while the word count may be acceptable, the number of pages is increased. With my manuscript, at 106,000 words (I know, I know, still too long, I'm working on it. Got the Ten-Point Revision Strategy at my side) the page count was 560 pages. With Times New Roman, it is 477 pages.

What this means is that with Times New Roman, your number of manuscript pages is approximately equal to the number of printed pages in an average book. This makes for an easy guide to determine your novel length.

In general, the formula comes down to the average text has 10 words per line, 25 lines per page for a total of 250 words per page. This is comparable to the word count of a published novel.

So while the romantic, walking through the garden, following your lovely muse response to the question would be; "write until the book is finished, not one word more or less." In reality, this just isn't true. It's fine, if you really don't care about publishing. But the honest, business-like, non-romantic, but infinitely more practical advice for a first-time writer, is follow the rules. 90,000-100,000 words for mainstream/thriller fiction. It shows professionalism on your part, writing skill, knowledge and will greatly increase your chances of actually getting your novel read.

Revising the Novel - Best Word Choice or Big Guts and Belly Fat

Just finished a meeting of Mimi's Boys on Thursday night (don't worry, my bruises will heal) and a very important lesson came up.

Best word choice.

Now, I've already touched on this subject in the Ten-Point Revision Strategy, but it came up again in a way that was slightly different, and my writing was to blame.

In one scene, I have my character, the ER Department Chairman, a rather big man (or Jabba Browne as one of my group members calls him) lean back in his chair and rest his hand on his stomach. In that sentence I said something to the effect of "leans back and rests his hand on his large gut."

Doesn't necessarily seem like the that should be the focal point of a long discussion, but believe me, it was.

As we'd discussed before, each word, every single word, that we commit to paper (printer) has to be exactly what we wish it to be. It must convey exactly what we want it to convey. But more importantly than just conveying information, it has to be entertaining. After all, isn't that the point? To entertain? That's what reading is. Certainly reading a novel, particularly a thriller.

Les, one of Mimi's Boys, stated emphatically that we have to strive to make each sentence as entertaining as possible. That' right, our responsibility isn't just to write an entertaining book, but to make sure that each and every sentence in that book is entertaining in and of itself.

To be honest, I hadn't ever thought of it that way before. But he's right.

We can't rely on 2nd or 3rd tier adjectives or descriptors or cliches to finish our sentences. There are no "throw away" paragraphs, or sentences or words. Each word must count. And we need to make sure that each word conveys the information we need it to in as entertaining a way as possible.

Case in point, my large gut.

Sure it emphasizes Dr. Browne's large mass, but is it said in as entertaining a way as possible?

Les jumped all over that one, giving me his sly, one eyebrow raised look that states so clearly, "you can do better than this." And again, he's right. With effort, we can all remove these rather efficient but bland modifiers and interject some personality, some deeper level of description, some humor and some entertainment.

It's a lot of work. It means going back over the novel, word by word, sentence by sentence, and continually asking yourself, does this say what I need it to say? Is there someway I can write this better? More descriptive, more original, more entertaining?

In the margins, Les crossed out my large gut and interjected, "placed his hand on the roll of fat above his belt." Damn if that isn't better. More descriptive, certainly more original and even slightly humorous.

Do you agree? Do you feel that each and every word/sentence has to be polished as much as possible for maximal entertainment? Send me your thoughts.

Now I'm going back to work. I'll bet there's quite a few large guts in my novel that could stand being replaced by some rolls of belly fat.

Revising the Novel - Writing the Sex Scene part 2

Back on the subject of sex.

As I mentioned in the prior post, of utmost importance to me when writing a sex scene is to avoid cliche. There are only so many non-offensive euphemisms you can use for penis. Even fewer for a vagina. Most of these are so full of purple prose that I'm embarrassed any time I even think of using one.

Breasts are easy. The word "breasts" works fine. So does nipple. But when it comes to the male and female genitalia, "penis" and "vagina" seem far too clinical for our writing. So we improvise. That's how things like "pulsating member," get published. I've even read once about a "vibrating stinger." I'm still scared at the thought.

My advice on this sensitive topic is to use the real words, or the least of the purple prose euphemisms. It is unlikely that you'll come up with a term that hasn't been used before, or one that is so terrifically original that it will send your scene over the top. Usually, all that results is that you succeed in drawing attention to your poor word choice and away from the steamy sex happening on the page.

Just write it.

Use the words we're all familiar with. Concentrate on the action and whatever originality you can create in the scene. The mood, the background, the character's thoughts, their actions, unique fetishes, etc.

Don't get hung up on the words, or else a pulsating member may inadvertently make its way into your writing.

Revising the Novel - Writing Groups part 3

In the last two posts, I wrote about what you need to be aware of before you decide to join a writing group. Understanding that a writing group that fits you well will be a tremendous asset to your writing, today I have to give the biggest warning of all.

I firmly believe that a writing group should be used with caution when you're writing a first draft. At this stage, you should be a burning cauldron of creativity. Your entire focus needs to be on getting the story out of your head. You don't want anyone or anything to squash that, particularly not the opinions of others. What you need to do is close the door, lock yourself in a nuclear bunker, and write, write, write. Get the draft done. Get your thoughts onto paper (computer?). Once that draft if done, you can unbarricade the door, readjust your eyes to the light of day, take a deep breath of fresh air, and let your group know you're ready.

You may disagree with me on this point, thinking that it'd be helpful for someone to give an opinion as you're writing so you'll know if you're off base or not. It isn't. All it does is stall your creativity. Finish the draft. Create your characters, follow your plot. Write your novel.

When you turn in first draft passages to the group one of two things inevitably happens.

1) The group focuses on the millions and millions of small mistakes you've made; grammar, punctuation, spelling, name inconsistencies, date inconsistencies etc. Those mistakes are supposed to be there, it's your first draft. But when you turn in a segment, looking for critique, and what comes back is a long list of grammatical errors, it drains your strength. Plus, invariably they haven't really tackled the big picture questions that you need to know, such as, does this make sense? The small errors become too much of a distraction.

Or even worse;

2) The group will offer their opinion on what they think you should be writing, where you should take a character, how a character should act, where the plot should go. While this sounds like it may be of some value, at this point it's really more of a hindrance. Until you've finished the book and you know where those points are going, the opinions of others are roadblocks. In the end, they will only confuse you, make you doubt your own story.

Both of these common responses from a writing group to your first draft will result in slowing your writing down, not helping it.

Finish the first draft. Pound it out. Get it done. Then, once the draft is finished, it's time to share it with the group. Use the writing group for revision.

That's where the value of the group lies. In the revision (hence the inclusion of writing groups in my Revising the Novel posts.) Once you're in the revision stage, then you want all those grammatical errors pointed out. Then you want to fix inconsistencies in character, plot, time and setting. Then you want to know, does this whole thing work?

And for these issues, a good writing group can be invaluable.

Revising the Novel - Writing Groups part 2

Continuing on with our discussion of writing groups and a long answer to the simple question, should I join one?

5) Committment of members. It's not easy writing, reading, meeting. it requires time and dedication. We meet every month, but at times, like right now when a member is gearing up for the Maui Writing Conference, we meet every two weeks. Everyone must be committed to this. The goal is to help each other succeed.

6) Your writing. In addition to the writing group, you must commit yourself to learning your craft. You can't rely on the group to "turn" you into a writer, nor to make mediocre writing, spectacular. A group is a useful tool, a fine-tuning instrument to prepare your writing for broader readership. It isn't, in and of itself, a substitution for classes, courses, reading and studying. You still must learn your craft.

7) Your fragility. Writing is not a career for the fragile. You're not here for the ego strokes, so if you decide to really commit yourself to writing, park your sensitivity at the door. Good or bad, not everyone will like everything you write, sometimes they're wrong. More often than not they're right.

8) Your filter. Your job is to take the critique and filter it through the mesh of your own certainty. You're the only one who knows what you're trying to do. If two people read something and one likes it, one doesn't, it comes back to you to decide if it's good or not. Opinions vary. If you love it, have the balls to keep it. If it always bothered you a little, then cut it. But if you send it to your group, and everyone agrees that a certain part is weak, or trite, or cliched, or just plain dumb, odds are it is. Keeping then would be an act of egotism. If the group hates it, it probably needs to be redone.

Now, you may wonder why this post is filed under my Revising the Novel section. It doesn't appear to be as directly related to revising as the Ten Point Revision Strategy or the Know Your Theme posts. But it is.

We'll get there next time.

Revising the Novel - Writing Groups

Often times, people ask whether or not they should be in a writing group.

Believe it or not, the answer isn't quite as straight foward as it may seem. The simple answer is 'yes.' Of course you should be in a writing group. You're a writer and the more people who read your stuff the better. You need the eyes on your material. You need the feedback.

But the simple answer isn't always the best.

In reality, the decision to join a writer's group is quite complex and depends upon a number of factors. Over the next two posts, I'm going to discuss the main issues that come to my mind, having been in a long-running writing group for about ten years. I'm basing this discussion on the premise that you're working your butt off writing with a goal to becoming published, not just wanting tea with some friends.

1) Who's in the group. What I mean by this is: is the group a serious group dedicated to writing and publishing or a casual group of repeat conference attendees who love the idea of being writers? If you yourself, are casual, by all means join the casual group, enjoy your tea. But if you're serious about your writing, you need to surround yourself with serious writers who'll get down to business, read your material and comment. The members don't all have to be writing the same type of fiction, in fact, I think it's better if they're not. While the idea of a "Romance Writers" writing group may sound good, I believe the conversation and critique may become a little self-contained and incestuous. It's good to have many writers from different genre's who'll push you to consider aspects of writing you may not normally consider. Such as a different view on character, conflict, or setting. Different genres use these differently, but we can all learn from each other.

2) The quality of critique. I'm sorry, but serious writers have no room in their life for pandering or hand holding. Critique, to be of any value, must be honest. If that is brutal, then fine. It doesn't do any one any good to hold back for fear of hurting feelings if there is a serious flaw in the writing . The best groups understand this. Rules should be set for how critique is delivered. It shouldn't be personal, teasing or patronizing, but honest. Flaws should be discussed not glossed over. Obviously, the group needs to be made up of people who's opinions you respect and trust, which you may not know at first. Mean spirited members should be asked to leave. But just as importantly, members who won't give negative comments for fear of hurting feelings should leave. We need direct, honest critique. What's good. What's bad. Now move on. This is a professional, not personal, endeavor.

3)The number of members. I think the optimal group size is four to five members. Six at the most. Otherwise, you won't be able to have a serious discussion about each member's writing at each meeting. Big groups are fun, but we're not there to have fun. We're not there to discuss upcoming wedding plans or weekends or car repairs. We're there to discuss writing. If that sounds anal, nonsocial and boring, then you don't need to be in a writing group, you need a social club. A real group knows how to say 'hello,' a few moments of small talk, then gets down to business. If you like each other, you can stay and socialize after the meeting or on weekends. Not when we're supposed to be writing.

4) The format of the group. Formats can take as many shapes as tigers have stripes (I almost wrote 'as lions have stripes.' Well, it is 4 am.) In my group, each member's material is reviewed at each session. Each writer sends out 20-30 pages to each member who then reads it, reviews it and writes comments. When we get together, we rotate who's material gets discussed first, then take turns talking about the submission. Everyone gets a chance to comment. The author is supposed to remain quiet, not defending, occasionally allowed to offer clarification. If that sounds rigid, then good. When you've published your book (or submitted it to an agent) you won't be standing there by the reader offering defense of your writing. Once you've submitted it, it has to stand on its own.

We rotate houses each meeting. The host used to provide some basic sustenence, but we've eliminated this as it started to become bigger and bigger, then we spent as much time eating as talking. Now, a bowl of nuts, some bottles of water and three hours of critique.

Not glamorous, but effective.

If you like this line of posting, let me know. I'll continue this thread in my next post. I'll be out of town on Thursday, so look for the next update on Saturday.

Thanks for reading, now get back to work. There's writing to do!

Revising the Novel - Theme to Story

What comes first, the theme or the story?

That's a very fundamental question, and I'm sure many of you have your own opinions on this. We can follow this up with a later question, what comes first, character or plot? But for now will stick to one concept. One theme if you will.

In my hands, story came first. I had an idea of a research project, a twist on current science that I wanted to explore. Idea led to plot, plot led to characters, characters led to story, story led to theme. It was only after I'd finished the novel, and gone through a couple of revisions that the main theme of forgiveness became apparent. At first, it was just a story about a pretty ambitious guy driven to do his research. It was only after the story evolved, that my hero kept going back, despite horrible odds, that it began to tick in my brain as to why. Why would someone continue to fight and fight, when the whole world is against him, when his whole life has collapsed? The underlying motivation had to be more than just the satisfaction of finishing the project, or money or fame. It had to be a reason deeply wrapped into the fabric of who he is.

In my story, it was his need for forgiveness, for himself and for his family.

Once I saw that, suddenly the story clicked. And that's the value of theme. Once you know your theme, then the story takes on the light of relevance. Suddenly, you can see scenes that contradict your theme, and they go. New scenes get added that enhance the theme, set it up, draw it out.

For me, the whole book changed. It was no longer a standard medial thriller, good guy fighting against bad guy for his project that meant, oh so much for the world. It was now a story about one man and his quest to move beyond his past, find peace and find meaning in his life.

Now, don't get me wrong. It's a medial thriller. I got blood and guts and bodies and car chases and murder, even poison, but don't you think having all that action surrounding a story that is so deeply personal makes it more interesting?

Stephen King says on theme that if you start with the theme, the book will fail. You must start with story. I suppose he knows. Last I checked he's sold more books than me (So far. Look behind you Stephen, I'm coming up fast) And in my opinion, Stephen King should be placed on the list of the greatest 20-21st century writers. Not because his books sell or are made into movies, but because most of his books move beyond the story, deeply into theme, and this makes them memorable. (not to mention that he's one of the great character writers of all time). We tend to think of King as the writer of Cujo, or Christine or Pet Semetary but let's not forget, he's also the writer of The Shawshank Redemption, Stand by Me, and The Green Mile. This man know's theme.

But even many of his horror books really delve into deeper topics, like The Shining, The Dead Zone, The Stand, even Carrie.

Still, I don't know if I entirely agree with his thought. Certainly, it is the way I wrote my book, story first then theme, but that doesn't mean its the only way. I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts on this, particularly the thoughts of the Plot Whisperer. I believe that if the theme is compelling enough for you, you can write a successful book, even in this day and age. But you must quickly move beyond theme into rich character, plot and story. Theme should be subtle, not omnipresent. A tickling under the skin, not a flesh wound.

Your thoughts?

The Ten-Point Revision Strategy - In Action

A little update post today.

As some of you may know, I came up with the Ten-Point Revision Strategy to help me complete the current revision of my novel, so what I'd like to do today is give you an idea of how well this strategy is working for me.

A touch of backstory. Before this revision started my novel, a medical thriller, was about 117,000 words. Not overbearing, but a little long for the genre. My agent, who's quite enthusiastic about the book, suggested I get it down to about 90-100,000 words. Now, think about that for a moment. I already told the story I wanted to tell, and it took me 117,000 words. How am I now supposed to keep that story intact and reduce it by roughly 20%. Daunting, to say the least.

Stephen King has shared a formula he learned from one of his mentors. Second draft = first draft - 10%. I like that formula, as it shows the type of editing we all need to do to tighten our stories. But I needed 20%, not 10. Ouch. To top it off, I tend to be an adder when I revise, not just a subtractor. I find scenes that I think need more embellishment, more sensory information, or movement, so I expand them, fill them out. So it isn't always a simple cutting action for me.

But still, one in every five words needed to go.

Hence, the Ten-Point Revision Strategy.

So far, I've been very happy with how the strategy has performed, guiding me along the path. Each point has worked as intended to help me focus on the core of the story, and the core of the writing; to trim, tighten and enhance.

I can't tell you how much I like point # 5 - End Each Chapter Earlier. Time and time again, I've used this, cutting out the last sentence, paragraph or even several paragraphs from each chapter, and always I've found it added to the drama. Clearly, I tended to overwrite the ends of my chapters, trying too hard to find a pat ending or a final summary. Not anymore. Cut em out. They're a vestigial organ and need to be removed. I can't encourage you enough to try adding this simple step to your own revision process.

I also tend to over-explain as I write. Since there is a lot of science in my novel, I found I spent quite a bit of time filling in research or simply explaining science to make my concept believable. Using rule #1 - Resist the Urge to Explain, I've cut this quite a bit. The science works best when I simply show it in action, having the characters talking about it as it's going along. Do you really need to know that in 1989 Dr. Demoisue ran into a horrible problem attempting to do something far simpler than what my hero is doing? Maybe. If I can bring it in in such a way that it enhances the drama. If it's just one big info dump, it's got to go. This applies equally to non-thrillers, particularly when introducing or working with character. Resist the Urge to Explain. Let the characters breathe on their own and reveal their past through their current actions and behaviors. Little details can be added, succinctly, then move on. Allow the character to reveal themselves, not the author.

Throughout this entire revision, I've been very conscious of movement, per point #8, and I'll never underestimate how much movement can help the flow of a story, particularly when the action is on pause.

And finally, I've been very happy with point #3 - Know Each Character's Motivation. Keeping this point in mind, I've been able to cut out several small scenes where it was apparent that the scene served the author (me) not necessarily the character. Nothing really happened, the characters didn't reveal anything new, or reveal new motivation or growth. The scenes were placeholders, separating other scenes, and nothing more. Now, they're gone.

Currently, I'm about 1/3 through the revision and I'm down to about 109,000 words. So I'm making progress. My original timeline was to finish by June 30. I may be a little bit off that goal, but the book is ending up tighter than I ever imagined.

In future posts, I'm going to start a block on character arcs and plotting, but for now, back to revising.

P.S. I'd like to thank Writer-in-Progress for her wonderful kind comments and very informative blog. The depth of writing resources available on the web today never fails to astound me.

Writing and the Muse

Sorry, I was unable to post this week, but work required me to be out of town. As a general rule, my plan is to post every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday, so if I miss one, you know I'm probably traveling.

In the meantime, I'd like to thank all the great blogs out there that have been so supportive of me, especially the Plot Whisperer, Word Stumpet, the Writer's Mentor and Me, My Muse and I. If you don't already have those earmarked, your missing out on some sage advice.

All of which brings me today's topic. The Muse.

I may inflame some controversy with this, and I hope not to offend, but I've attended enough writing seminars to know that there are a large number of people in love with the thought of writing, but not the work of writing itself. You may have seen some them, women and men, wrapped up in a romantic fantasy about the life of a writer. Women sharing a Jane Austen fantasy, where they wear flowing gowns, walking leisurely through rose gardens, strolling until that beautiful moment when inspiration strikes, the muse arrives, and they're carried on a warm wind to their waiting pen and paper. The men tend to have more of a Papa Hemingway fantasy, reclusive and isolated, enmeshed in their world of hurt, until the muse helps them to express all the true sentiment in their hearts.

Most of these people will never become successful writers. Most will never complete a finished book. Some may, most won't.

Stories don't come on the wings of fairies, sprinkled into our ears with a trace of pixie dust. Writing can't wait until you feel inspired, or until the heart is bursting full to capacity.

Writing is work. Writing is a job. Writing is commitment.

As I'm typing this. It is 4:57 am. I've been up since 3:30. My agent wants this revision finished. My editor wants this revision finished. The publisher won't wait until I feel inspired or motivated to write. They want it now. And just as importantly, I want to give it to them now. Fortunately, early morning hours are good times for me. I wake up easily (three dogs that want breakfast at 4:00 am each morning see to that) but I don't wake up this early by choice. It's a commitment. I'm committed to being a writer, the best writer I can be. And more than inspiration, more than motivation, more than a muse, it requires time.

Since the first of my many $1 million checks hasn't arrived from the publisher or Hollywood yet, I have a day job. I also have a wife, a son and three Lhasa Apsos, and I love to spend time with all them. The only way I could squeeze all this into a 24 hour day was to give up something, and that was my mornings. So each day, saturday and sunday included, I get out of bed at 4:00 am, feed my doggies, make my coffee and head to my writing office. I try to get three hours in each weekday before the family awakes, 5 or 6 hours on the weekends. I bring my computer on work trips and family vacations. My schedule never changes.

Certainly, some mornings I'm more awake than others, or more productive. But it doesn't matter. Each day, I'm there. And that's important. To make that commitment to being at your writing desk, no matter where it is, each day. Some days it will flow, some days you'll struggle, but you'll be writing. And hopefully, you'll find, as I do, that the more you write, even when you don't want to, the easier writing becomes. It's as if you create some sort of writing "muscle memory," a reflex that kicks you into writing mode, even when the muse hasn't visited.

I'm not saying that what I do is the best way, or the only way. It may not even be sane. But it is the only way it works for me, to get in the necessary time, feeding the writing beast.

And to me, that's what writing is. It's not an enchanted forest where I run away to explore new worlds full of magical creatures, or a garden to stroll through in endless meditation. I create those places and worlds in my writing. No, the act of writing itself is a beast, a multi-headed monster that needs to be fed every day, rain or shine, whether you feel like feeding it or not. But don't worry, it is a beast that can be tamed, taught to do amazing tricks, return to you what you give it in multiples, but a beast nonetheless.

Writing is a job. A commitment. A necessity.

Writing is.

Revising the Novel - Back to Theme part 3

I've been amazed at how powerful thematic thinking could be. To me, theme was always a nebulous term, something I searched for (or made up) in high school literature classes, trying to place meaning into a story that I didn't necessarily think had meaning. But now I've changed my mind completely. Theme is a powerful, provocative tool. Now don't get me wrong. If used incorrectly, too heavy-handed, didactic or pedantic, it will kill your story, slog it down with verbiage and your strong desire to "make a message." But used correctly, it can enhance your story, elevate it, give it substance or as Stephen King calls it, resonance.

Here's how theme can benefit your story:

1) Once you've identified your theme, which you'll usually find in the changes (or lack of changes) in your major character or characters throughout your novel, it gives you a powerful focus for your revision. My story is about a scientific/medical experiment, a cool one at that, but my theme is really the growth that happens in my hero. With this in mind, I now have a pinpoint focus on the story I need to tell. All extraneous scenes can be cut, scenes that don't move my story forward and lead to this conclusion. Maybe a few scenes need to be added, scenes that are necessary to properly set up the conflicts and changes my hero will go through. Again, I'm not talking heavy stuff here. The vehicle through which my hero's change occurs starts off as a subplot to his getting the experiment started. But as the story progresses, and he battles with forces trying to stop him etc, that subplot re-emerges and becomes crucial to the finale. A powerful demonstration of how his research has changed him, while showing him in action, using that very research project.

2) With your concept of theme in hand, you finally know what your novel is about. This is huge when you come to trying to sell your book. As I mentioned earlier, during my discussion with Robert Dugoni, when he asked me what my book was about, I stumbled on endlessly about minor plot points and incidental characters and complications. That is what my plot was about, but not my book. I can't tell you how much I struggled with this. When I was writing queries, I was near incoherent in trying to get across my story. How was I supposed to reduce 450 pages of boiling plot into two paragraphs that were interesting enough to get the agent's attention? Theme. That's the answer. Remember, you book isn't about your plot. Your plot is a vehicle to tell a story. Your story is your theme.

After babbling on to Robert for what seemed like hours (I do believe kingdoms rose and fell in the time it took me to stumble through my plot) Robert politely nodded and said, "So your story is about a doctor, driven by the suicide of his brother to complete a research project, only to find that in the end, it leads to his own redemption as he learns to forgive his past."

To which I could only reply, as intelligently as possible, "Um, yeah."

Now, how embarrassing is it to have a complete stranger, someone I've known for less than an hour, turn around in just a few moments, and tell me what my novel was about far more coherently than I ever could? Robert is exquisitely tuned into the concept of theme. As an expert story-teller, he can sift through the detritus of subplots and characters and drill down to the root of the story. That's what makes his writing so effective. That's why he's a best-seller.

So, now armed with Roberts digestion of my novel, I went back and took a deeper look. Suddenly, my book made sense to me. It wasn't about the research (as cool as it is) or the villains trying to stop it, or the murders, or the political intrigue, or the manhunt, it was about one lonely, self-isolated guy, living in a world of hurt, searching desperately for salvation, believing he'd find the answer locked in a musty old basement laboratory, when in reality, the answer always rested within his own family and forgiveness.

Sounds like a better story to me.

Revising the Novel - Back to Theme part 2

So the real question then, is what is your book about?

You can write a story about a doctor who solves a mass murder case at her hospital, but underneath the story, if you look hard, you'll probably find a deeper message or idea running through. This is the theme, at least in the way I use the word.

Now, after you've finished your first draft, poured your heart and soul out onto the paper (or as I heard it referred to once,"breaking open the bones to find the marrow") it's time to take a look back at what you've done. Most authors recommend a cooling off period, which I agree with. Stephen King recommends six weeks, which seems about right. Finish the draft, put it away, clear your mind, meditate on a mountain and work on another project for a short while. A short story, a magazine article, your blog, whatever it takes to keep your fingers and mind writing, but not on your novel.

Then, when the grapes have fermented, bring the book back up and re-read it. The first revision (before you get to the Ten-Step Revision Strategy which is the final revision) is to look for major issues, character issues, plot, setting, time inconsistencies etc, and also theme.

During this revision, usually something will begin to stand out, at first maybe just a tickling at your brain, but with due diligence you'll see that beyond the thriller about the murder at the hospital, something else happened. This is usually revealed in one of the character arcs of your story, usually the hero. It may be as simple as how the events of the story changed her or altered her world view. It may be reflected in the change of her attitudes towards other characters or her work or her home. It may be hard to find at first, but it's usually there. Search for it, brush the dust off, sweep away the detritus, and you'll find it. Your theme.

Now, you may ask why is it important to find this, to know that deeper underlying story when, in reality, all you've set out to do was write about a murder at the hospital. My view on this is very simple. Knowing the theme can only make your book stronger. That theme, if portrayed properly, without too much emphasis, becomes the readers "Aha," moment. Their take home message. It's not a moral, just a lingering thought. It's what can make your book stand out above all the other hospital murder stories ever written. It's what makes your writing, yours.

Once you've identified the theme (perseverance against all odds, a young woman's struggle for success and independence, whatever) then when you're revising, it becomes very easy to add scenes or embellish scenes that help to bring this theme to the surface, or eliminate scenes that are contradictory or non-helpful.

The story is still about your story, but by bringing that theme to life, your story becomes about so much more.

This is what I've been doing recently with my book. I've finally identified the theme, and suddenly the whole story seems so much clearer to me.

More on that next time.

Revising the Novel - Back to Theme

Let's get back to our earlier conversation about theme.

There's an excellent discussion of theme in Steven King's book, On Writing, A Memoir of the Craft, which I would recommend to anyone who's interested in writing novels. Considering that these are the words of one of the best-selling writers of all time, it's certainly worth paying attention to what he has to say. His take on theme is very similar to mine, or should I say, my take is very similar to his (as I'm certain his views on this topic came first.)

First of all, theme doesn't have to be big, overblown deal, and in fact, it shouldn't. To sit down and write a book about "X" theme, because you really want to make a moral or philosophical statement is usually a set-up for failure. In the days past, readers may have had patience for a dissertation on what the authors moral views of a subject were or their grand view on life, but not today. With the short-attention spans we're confronted with, any preaching you do as a writer is probably going to be all the excuse the reader needs to put the book down. No, in today's multi-media age, all that really matters is the story. Particularly with thrillers. Keep it engaging, keep it exciting and keep it moving.

But that doesn't mean your book may not make a grander statement than a simple shoot-em-up. In fact, the best thrillers will make a statement, or a leftover lingering thought, something to make the reader go "Hmmmm, so that's what this is about." The important thing is that the theme shouldn't (can't) overpower the story. Remember, story always comes first.

I didn't set out with a deliberate theme when I started my novel. I wanted to tell a story, based in science and medicine, about an experiment that goes horribly wrong and its consequences for my hero. As it turns out, this is the approach Stephen King recommends as well. Write your book, tell your story, then look back and see what your story is really about. It's probably not about the big gunfight, or in Stephen's case, the vampires haunting the New England town, it's about the people. And usually some very specific aspect of the people.

With this in mind, as I set out to follow the Ten-Point Strategy to revise my novel, I started thinking about what deeper story my book told. At first I thought it was a "David vs Goliath" type of story, but after my discussion with Robert Dugoni, I began to realize that it was something very different, and in truth, much more satisfying.

More on that next time.

Pick up Stephen King's On Writing here: On Writing

Revising the Novel - Use of the Ten-Point Revision Strategy

Before we continue on with our discussion about theme in the novel, and how, with a little bit of time and thought, your discovery of the theme of your novel will sharpen and tighten your writing, I wanted to make two quick digressions.

First, I wanted to thank all the readers who've come over and left comments. Your response has been greater than I ever imagined. I created the Ten-Point Revision Strategy out of necessity to finish this (hopefully) final draft of my novel. My agent is waiting for it and I was struggling to get it done. I needed a guidepost, some freeway signs to get me moving in the right direction. I wanted to share with all interested writers this strategy as a suggested tool that may help your writing as well. So, thank you.

Secondly, I wanted to move back to an early point in the strategy, #5 End Chapter Earlier, and add an example. As I'm going through my revision, I've utilized this point at almost every opportunity, and I've been amazed at how much it can improve a chapter.

The goal here is very simple and follows the old axiom: Start after the beginning, end before the ending.

I'd found in my writing, I tended to end with neat little summaries or chapter tie-ups that I believed set up the next chapter or created a cliff hanger ending. After learning this tip from Robert Dugoni, I've rethought this part of my writing, and as I'm moving through this revision, I've tried cutting out at least the last paragraph, or more, of each chapter. And I think it works.

Here's an example from my novel, with the before and after point #5 revision. Please comment back on whether or not you think this simple strategy hasn't made the ending more interesting, less predictable and more ominous. I look forward to reading your responses.

Not much set-up is needed for this scene. The Senator is talking to a member of his inner circle, discussing a research project (our hero's) that has become a hot topic in the upcoming election. For reasons revealed in the novel, the Senator needs the project to fail to bolster his candidacy. The reader, by this time, knows something is up, some sabotage of the research is planned, but not what that plan is.

Here's before the use of point #5.

Roderick nodded. “But that’s not the issue here—“

“But it is,” the Senator said, holding up his hands. “Don't lose sight of that. The failure of Abrahms’s research will bring unprecedented exposure to this issue. The family connection makes it even stronger. We just need to play our cards right. Once his research fails my stock will soar. This will hand us the election.”

“What if he succeeds?”

“He won’t.”

“But what if—“

The Senator cut him off with a gaze so full of certainty it made Roderick shudder. “He won’t.”

Roderick nodded and rose to his feet. “I’ll keep the forces in check.” He turned and headed towards the Pennsylvania Street exit.

McIntyre watched Roderick walk by the Iraqis, then reached into his breast pocket, pulling out his iphone. With deft movements, he typed a message then launched it into cyberspace.

It’s time for action. . . immediately

He knew the recipient would know what the pre-planned course of action would be.

And now here's after.

Roderick nodded. “But that’s not the issue here—“

“But it is,” the Senator said, holding up his hands. “Don’t lose sight of that. The failure of Abrahms’s research will bring unprecedented exposure to this issue. The family connection makes it even stronger. We just need to play our cards right. Once his research fails my stock will soar. This will hand us the election.”

“What if he succeeds?”

“He won’t.”

“But what if—“

The Senator cut him off with a gaze so full of certainty it made Roderick shudder. “Don’t worry. He won’t.”

It's such a simple change. All I did was cut out that last little bit, a concluding action, but I think it makes the ending much stronger. What do you think?

If you like this idea, try it in your own writing and see if it doesn't help.

Revising your novel - Know Your Theme

I had a very interesting experience recently in a conversation with Robert Dugoni. For those who don't know Robert, he's a very talented, quite successful writer, who first books have all been best-sellers.

As we were talking, he asked me what my novel was about. Now, I've been working on this book since before the dawn of time. I've been living with it, married to it, at times divorced from it. I know it inside and out. I already have an agent for it, and Warner Books has asked me for this final revision that I'm now working on, as they're considering it. In other words, I know this book.

But do you know what I said?

To paraphrase my babbling: "It's a story about a guy who is working on this amazing medical research project, and his family is dead, and his wife is the daughter of a senator, and there's this company in Silicon Valley, and there's this contract killer, and they want the project to stop, and it all goes wrong, and. . . and. . . and. . . "

In other words, I didn't have the slightest idea what my book was about. What was the core of the story? What was the through story, the magnet that would pull the reader from the beginning to the end? What was the payoff?

We're going to talk about theme for the next several posts, and I'm going to use the term loosely, probably not as academically as a writing professor would, because in this day and age, theme in a thriller is a loosely applied technique. But in the end, it still has to be there.

After you've written the first draft, after you've poured your heart out and bled your soul onto the blank page. Once you've begun the revision process through the Ten-Point Revision strategy, it's time to step back, take a good look at your book and ask yourself, "What is my book about?"

If you're like me, the answer may astound you. It turns out my book isn't about any of the and, and, ands, that I stuttered out to Robert.

It's so much more.

The Ten-Point Revision Strategy - #10 Move the Story Forward

In the end, this is what it's all about.

Move the Story Forward.

Everything we've discussed so far, each of the previous 9 points, have all been aimed at this goal. Keep the story moving, keep the reader involved, or to paraphrase, Elmore Leonard, cut out the parts that readers skip.

Sometimes, in order to be true to this principle, we have to be cruel. In this current revision, I've cut out two of my favorite scenes, what were in my mind grand displays of my writing, because quite honestly, they weren't necessary.

In one scene, my hero has just finished a grueling Grand Rounds conference to get his research approved. In this scene, I have him working with a nurse, Mary, repairing a head laceration on a construction foreman, while he and the nurse discuss the Rounds. I loved that scene. It showed my hero in action, being very competent in the ER. It showed Mary's enthusiasm, and therefore all the hospital's support staff's, for the project, and the construction guy's random comments added a quick touch of humor into a scene that normally wouldn't be funny. I loved that scene.

There was only one problem. It wasn't necessary.

I'd already shown my hero in action in the ER, in a much more tense, character revealing scene. Chapter One to be precise. I'd already alluded to the fact that the hospital was abuzz over this pending research project. And as cute as the construction guy was, he was not a part of the story. In the end, after careful analysis, I realized that the only new bit of information the scene revealed was that the research project was being sent to a Bioethics Committee meeting for another review. This meant that our hero only had 48 hours to show results of his project before the Bioethics committee would cut him off.

Now that's a big point. Adding a time deadline always adds drama and tension to the story. We've got to get something done and we've got to get it done now. But I didn't need a 5-page scene of my hero sewing up some guy's head laceration to show this.

So I cut it.

I took that one simple necessary paragraph and inserted it into a brief memory flash our hero has while he's speeding in his car to his lab. He's got to get his work done because. . . And now the car is in motion, describing through movement, so the story is launching forward while I reveal this one point.

I hated to do it, but I think you can see just from this description that it makes the story better. The reader doesn't want to see another ER scene, they want to see the experiment. The whole book so far has been leading up to the moment this research begins, why would I want to stick another chapter in there, acting as a roadblock to what the reader wants?

Move the story forward. Kill off your favorite writing if it isn't doing that. Cut out the parts the reader's skip.

P.S. For those interested, I've taken the Ten-Point Revision Strategy and created an article for Writer's Digest. I'll let you all know when it's published. But in the meantime, keep moving your story forward.

The Ten-Point Revision Strategy - #9 Shorten as Tension Increases

This little tip is a must for thriller writers.

Shorten as Tension Increases.

By shorten, I mean shorten the length of sentences, shorten the length of words used, shorten the paragraphs. Essentially, shorten anything that can be shortened.

This is a neat tip, because it's not just referring to the act of writing, but how that writing looks and is read on the printed page. Shortening the sentences as the tension is mounting creates a staccato feeling for the reader, a bop, bop, beat that automatically makes them read faster. Using shorter words and shorter paragraphs, intensifies this effect, so as you story is moving faster, so is the reader's eye and hopefully the reader's heart.

Here's a quick example from Robert Dugoni's best-selling The Jury Master. In this scene, our hero arrives home to find his house ransacked, his cat Bud running across the kitchen.

"Sloane looked down at the broken plate at his feet, which a moment earlier had been on the leaning stack amid the contents of his cupboards. Bud had apparently been standing on the stack, licking at a puddle of syrup that had overflowed the counter. That explained the shattered glass. It didn't explain the destruction. That thought came simultaneously with the sound.

Soft footsteps behind him.

Too slow to turn, Sloane felt something hard slam against the back of his head."

Notice the pacing. Two fairly long sentences, establishing scene, placing the hero. Then it gets fast. Shorter sentences. A one sentence paragraph, then POW, the violent conclusion.

Reading this passage, you can't help but get swept up in the pacing as the tension builds.

Shorten as the Tension increases. As I'm doing now.

To get back to writing.

My book.

The Ten-Point Revision Strategy - #8 Describe Through Movement

Another one of my favorite points on the Ten-Point Strategy and one that has had the biggest impact on my writing.

Describe Through Movement.

Back in the day of Melville and Dickens (before television, MTV and Youtube, when reading was the only form of entertainment) it was perfectly acceptable for authors to expound endlessly on the weather, the flow of grass across a hillside, the decor of a room, the fall of a woman's dress.

Not any more.

In today's world of short-attention span theater, things need to be speeded up, and particularly for thrillers, they need to be in constant motion. Now I don't mean a swirling maelstrom of nonstop action, and I don't mean to say that description and setting aren't important to a story, but never underestimate the power of movement as a technique to get a point across.

One of the simplest ways I incorporate this in my writing is in describing a new setting. Say my character Taylor enters a new room, like his lab for the first time. While I'd love to go into vivid description about the chaotic mess that is his basement laboratory, stressing certain details to show how bare-bones, low budget their funding is, in truth, I'd lose the reader right away. They don't want a long dissertation on the room, they want the story. Yet, some details need to be shared, to place the story, to set the tone and to show that these guys are broke. The way to do it is through movement.

Rather than having the narrator jump in and give a quick info dump on the room, I need to show Taylor walking through the room. Describe the furniture as he walks by it or trips over it. Describe the chaos as he steps over piles. Let his gaze shift to the crumbling plaster on the walls or brush the pile of chocolate wrappers off the desk. Subtle movements like this allow the author to include all the detail necessary to tell the story, without stopping the story to do it.

Since I've learned this technique, from Tess Gerritsen, I've gone back to quite a few of my static descriptions and simply put them into movement. And the results have been dramatic. Try it in your own story at any point of static description. When describing a person, have them in movement. When describing a setting, have someone or something moving in or through that setting. See if it doesn't make your writing more lively.

And that's the way I think of my novels today, one beautiful, flowing, moving story. Hopefully one where the movement will sweep the reader up and carry them along for the ride.